I don’t know about you, but I’m excellent at looking way too far ahead, when actually what matters most is the here and now.
Last night I found myself obsessing about when L goes to high school and (don’t laugh) ensuring I keep on the same wavelength as her throughout the teenage years. I like to think I keep my finger on the pulse, but seriously, how am I supposed to know what’s ‘cool’ then?
When she was a baby I remember worrying about future birthday parties, knowing the pressure they could bring. Sounds ridiculous, doesn’t it? And actually, in that case, both kids got to the age of class get-togethers and it hasn’t been the big deal I made it out to be. At all.
Similarly, on my own first day at school, I expressed a fear to my mum of being taught by a notoriously fierce teacher. She was known for a very scary approach and as a four year old, I totally dreaded crossing her path. Again, as it turned out, by the time I got to that year group, the person in question had retired. Lesson learnt- sometimes, the worry is so much worse than the reality ever turns out to be.
I do like to be organised and prepare for events, dates and financial situations, yet there is a huge difference between this and causing yourself totally unnecessary worry. As kids get older their lives are such a clear measurement of time approaching and passing. In fact, this for me provides an even greater incentive to ditch the negative anticipation and just embrace the present.
So, I’m forcing myself to reign things in and keep asking, what is amazing right now? Which people, plans and places are currently making me happy? I will keep being that organised person (I may have already started putting Christmas presents away), but only in the most positive sense. Embracing the here and now is my new number one priority.